Humor
The Complete Emotional Guide to the Nine Months of Pregnancy
Welcome!It makes no difference if this is the first time you're expecting a child or the twelfth. Either way, when you find yourself dealing with a variety of challenges, and completely drained of both physical and emotional energy, you're liable to feel like you're the only one in the world so exhausted by this journey.But that's just it. You're not alone. You're in good company! Rucheleh Lambersky, psychotherapist, group facilitator - and more importantly, mother of eight children, kein yirbu - invites you to join the club, where you'll find yourself alongside many righteous women dealing with the same challenges as you.In Welcome to the Club! you'll get energy and a laugh, discover new insights based on the experiences of many others, and find practical, therapeutic tools to help you cope on a day-to-day basis.What do you say? Are you joining us? We've reserved a spot especially for you! Learn More
A Collection of Advice Columns by Comedian Mordechai SchmutterNewspaper advice columns are a weird tradition: "Let me ask a total stranger about my personal problems, so he can answer in front of thousands of other total strangers in nothing resembling a timely manner. And hope I don’t have to ask a follow-up question."
In a way, it's a cheaper version of therapy. Like if you pay the going hourly rate, you get a whole 45 minutes, there are no spectators to your personal problems, and there are free tissues. But for the cost of a newspaper subscription, this is what you get. And you’re going to be happy with it. Until now.Ever since Mordechai Schmutter began writing humor columns, people have been coming up to him and asking him questions. Most of them unprintable. And that's weird, because, as he’s demonstrated in his columns, he is not an expert on anything
But some of the questions are printable, to the point where he has selflessly decided to start a second column - a column dedicated to answering these questions - a column that puts the "Um" in Advice Column - a column that places a prime emphasis not on embarrassing the person asking the question, but on dwarfing it with the extent to which he embarrasses himself. And rather than give advice that is helpful only for that one person in one specific situation that may no longer be relevant, he heroically gives advice that’s not actually helpful at all. That way, everyone wins.
This is his first collection of this column - a column that, above all, proves that there is no such thing as a ridiculous question. Just ridiculous answers. Learn More
Disclaimer to end all disclaimers:This book does not contain every possible disclaimer. You’ve been warned.
Caution: Do not judge book by other side.
Notice: Introduction sold separately.
Warning: Do not use book as a public telephone.
Notice: Do not read this book if you cannot read.
Missing cat! Return to Schrödinger, dead or alive!
Notice to residents of the United States:
Federal law requires that we post this notice on each copy of this book entitled Stop, Drop, and LOL. If you notice a book that’s missing this notice, please call and notify us at once. you may be eligible for a cash reward!! (The number to call appears on the bottom of each notice.)
Notice: If you’ve purchased this cover without the book, assume that someone else has the funny material that you paid for and is literally laughing at your expense right now.
Beware: If it’s so dark that you can’t read this warning, your shin is about to make contact with something sharp.
Danger: Never read the fine print. If there was anything in it that’s good for you they would have printed in huge letters.
Inside: Complete Guide on How to Burn Books [Caution: Do not dispose of this book in fire.] Learn More
Beloved 'Town of Chelm' Returns in the World’s First Definitive Encyclopedia of Chelm StoriesAfter enjoying decades of acclaim in the pages of the acclaimed weekly newspaper, THE JEWISH PRESS, the lovable, side-splitting tales from the legendary town of Chelm have been collected in the world’s first encyclopedia of Chelm stories. This new treasury of Jewish wit and whimsy brims with over 150 stories straight out of the fabled town of Chelm — the place where solving life’s practical problems was never a straightforward affair, but rather a rollicking journey into the inane.
The world’s first 408-page definitive encyclopedia of Chelm stories re-acquaints readers with the unforgettable characters that everyone’s come to know and love, including, ‘The Wise Sage of Chelm,’ and fumbling ‘Shepsil.’ The simple-minded, ‘Mottel the Tailor,” and riotous, “Berel the Terrible.” In all, original writer and creator, Arnold Fine’s, recipe for simple and clean Jewish humor still delivers, and with so many stories gathered together in one book, ‘The Silly World of Chelm,’ is guaranteed to provide hours of fun and enjoyment for the whole family. In the new 8x10 large-format book, with a uniquely decorated padded cover, you’ll read about the, ‘Green-Eyed Monster,’ and ‘The Adventures of Kunkle and Munkle.’ You’ll enjoy the hilarious tale of ‘The Mayor’s Shoes,’ and learn about the formation of the ‘Worriers of Chelm,’ plus dozens and dozens of more popular tales.
“The brilliantly conceived, eccentric scenarios have, for decades, left readers of all ages in stitches with helpless laughter, all the while leaving them scratching their heads in wonderment,” explains Zalman Goldstein, author of other children’s titles such as, ‘The Sultan’s Trap’ and the popular ‘Uncle Yossi’s Big Book of Stories’ series. “Being able to provide good, kosher humor for everyone is a privilege that is difficult to pass up. In this regard, ‘The Silly World of Chelm,’ really delivers!”
LIST OF INCLUDED CHELM STORIES:
A Fish Story
A Portion of Paradise
A Stone in the Road
A Visit to The Doctor
Berel the Terrible
Charity
Chicken Planting Time
Giving Thanks
How to Bury A Hole
How to Succeed in Business
Ivan the Terrible
Nachum the Water-Carrier
Naming a Baby
On Becoming Wise
Rich Man, Poor Man
The Accountant
The Adventurers
The Adventures of Kunkle and Munkle
The Airplane
The Airplane II
The Animal Lover
The Bird Seed
The Bird
The Blessed Events
The Blessing
The Briefcase
The Budget Problem
The Bully
The Bus Driver
The Businessman
The Businessman II
The Businessmen III
The Buttered Bread
The Chandelier
The Choir and the Train
The Cobbler and the Chicken Farmer
The Old Sage and the Czar
The Debate
The Dentist
The Diet
The Doctor
The Doctor II
The Doctor III
The Doctor IV
The Dog Catcher
The Dog Catcher II
The Donkey Dilemma
The Door
The Door II
The Dream
The Dreamer
The Election in Chelm
The Electric Car
The Elephant
The Elevator
The Emergency
The Encyclopedia of Chelm
The Encyclopedia of Chelm II
The Entrance Examination
The Escape
The Executive
The Eye Examination
The Eyeglasses
The Feathers
The Fence
The Financial Crunch
The Fire
The Fishermen
The Foolish List
The Foolish Souls
The Foreman
The Gleaning of Knowledge
The Goat
The Goat (ver. 2)
The Gold Coins
The Great Sage of Chelm
The Green-Eyed Monster
The Highwaymen of Chelm
The Highwaymen of Chelm II
The Highwaymen of Chelm III
The Hole in the Boat
The Horse and Wagon
The Horse Thieves
The Hypnotist
The Insurance Salesman
The Invalid
The Journey
The Jumping Frog of Chelm
The Key
The Key Executive
The Kopeck Game
The Lesson
The Letter
The Lion and the Bear
The Lost Money
The Loyal Worker
The Marital Problem
The Marriage Arrangement
The Mayor’s Shoes
The Medicine
The Miracle of Space
The Mirror
The Morning Service
The Mother-in-Law
The New Math
The New Pupils
The New School
The New School Teacher
The New Shul
The Painter
The Painting
The Pair of Shoes
The Patient
The Perfect Shidduch
The Philosophers
The Philosophy Student
The Pious One
The Plaque
The Poor Dog
The Prisoner
The Psychologist
The Punishment
The Purse
The Raffle
The Rainmaker
The Report Card
The Restaurant
The Rich, the Poor, and the Blintzes
The Riddle
The Scientists
The Search
The Secret Ballot
The Senior Citizen
The Shoe Salesman
The Shoelaces
The Shrewd Farmer
The Sign Painter
The Sinner and the Horse
The Snowfall
The Sting
The Stone Storehouses
The Storekeeper
The Stranger and the Cemetery
The Stream
The Suitor
The Tax Collector
The Teacup Salesman
The Team
The Telegraph
The Telephone
The Thief
The Town Meetings
The Train
The Train Ride
The Train Station
The Train Schedule
The Traveler
The Trip to Minsk
The Tzedakah Box
The Verdict
The Video Machine
The Visitor
The Window-Washer of Chelm
The World of Credit
The Worrier of Chelm
The Worriers of Chelm
There’s a Right Way and a Left Way
Traveling First Class
Twins Are Twins
Watching the Stranger Learn More
Let's be honest: It happens. Many a couple lose the spirit that they felt at their chasunah. All too often, things get stale.How do we find the joy in our marriages, once again? How do we regenerate the spirit? How do we become better spouses? How does the oneness of the phenomenon of ishto kigufo and baalah kigufah proliferate?
Many words of mussar are inevitably distant from us. Too delicate and fragile to allow such words to permeate our being, we build mental walls of protection around ourselves that are impenetrable. In truth, these are not walls that protect us. They are destructive and debilitating as they proscribe change and rejuvenation. They are particularly damaging when they impinge on the delicate relationship of marriage.
What does work?
Rabbi Yehoshua Kurland is a renowned educator and bestselling author who, for decades, has successfully penetrated hearts and broken through barriers with his inimitable style of teaching. His genius lies in his ability to share deep and powerful messages in conjunction with humorous stories and jokes in the spirit of the classic Talmudic milsa d'bidichusa.
Through his wit, we become open to his teachings.
Through his wisdom, we become open to change and inspiration.
It is time to re-discover simchah in our marriages.
It is time to celebrate our lives together and the symphony of marriage.
It is time to recognize that the happiness we felt under the chupah can last a lifetime and that indeed, it is always: A Time to Dance. Learn More
A practical and supportive guide to safe dieting, spiced with a touch of humor. Real life situations from the world of a frum woman.You've attempted a dozen diets or more. You've lost track of how many times you've promised yourself that this time you'll really stick to your goal and lose weight. Over the years, you've shed hundreds of pounds, just to gain them all right back!
How about trying something new for a change? Let go of the diet and start losing weight - once and for all! Here's a little secret: Diets are tough, but losing weight can be much easier than you think!
My approach doesn't require any major lifestyle change or force you to spend your day counting calories. Instead, all I ask is that you leave your battleaxe aside and simply listen to yourself! My approach draws upon the foundations of life coaching and psychodrama, but is presented by someone who always prefers cream cake to lettuce and whose best friend is Chocolate! I oppose starvation rations and engaging in constant battle against the enemy called Food, and I equally respect your desire to eat and your desire to lose weight and will prove to you that these two conflicting interests can coexist peacefully.
This book, based on the weight-loss courses that I lead, is presented in a colorful, amusing and experiential comic format. Spiced with a good dose of humor and several grains of salt, it analyzes typical scenarios taken from our world: The Woman's World.
Over the years, hundreds of course participants and alumnae have learned to really listen to themselves. Best of all, they have lost considerable amounts of weight and managed to maintain their new weight long-term, regardless of what was happening in their lives.
So why not give yourself the chance? You've got nothing to lose, except your weight! Learn More
Nothing that happens in the Schneider household is normal!What happens when...
...Bentzy decides to find the queen in order to make the brachah of "Shechalak mikvodo l'basar v'dam"?
...Lali calls the fire department to rescue a cat from the roof?
...Motty tries to see if he can turn into a wax figure?
...Yoni becomes Saba's tour guide for the Tower of London?
The answers will truly surprise you, and probably make you laugh out loud.
Join the 21 Schneider children on their fascinating and creative adventures in the heart of London! Learn More
![David]()
Brooklyn, NY 11213
Toll Free:
1-888-2-JUDAICA
Phone: 718-604-1020
Fax: 718-771-3449
- Sun-Tues10:00am-7:00pm
- Wednesday10:00am-7:30pm
- Thursday10:00am-8:00pm
- Friday10:00am-1:30pm
- ShabbosClosed
- Sun11:00am-5:00pm
- Mon-Thurs10:00am-7:00pm
- Friday10:00am-2:30pm
- ShabbosClosed
